Friday, March 07, 2008

Finding a Bear-Leader

Three days, three days.
The Anonymous Patron had given me only three days to find my Bear-Leader (a chaperon for my Grand Tour).
I arrived, despondent, at Norma Jean's front door.
She led me into the kitchen and made some soothing tea.
I explained the problem. Just as she was reaching for that infallible Oracle, the Constance Spry Cookery Book, an insistent tapping attracted our attention.
Hieronymous the axolotyl was uncharacteristically mobile within his domain, his gills aquiver.
Norma Jean leaned
closer, nodding, her face illuminated by the glow from a small model Moulin Rouge, a recent addition to the extensive decor of his abode.
'But of course, my dear Found, you need search no further. Here is your Bear-Leader.
Well, Axolotyl Leader I suppose really, but nonetheless, a most suitable chaperon for your European Odyssey'
This I had to agree was true, for if I took on faith Norma Jean's assertion of mystic guidance from the pages of the Constance Spry Cookery Book, I had to accept also her certitude, that Hieronymous, in a past form, was indeed a milliner in Revolutionary Paris.
'But Norma Jean, I cannot understand him' I quailed as the flaw in this gleaming jewel of insight became apparent.
'But you shall. We shall practice. It really is not hard at all'
And so it transpired that, as you see from the photo, Hieronymous and I set sail on this grand adventure together.
He, comfortably ensconced in a specially fitted tank in
my bag, myself attired in my new striped suit. I had some misgivings about the crew of the vessel, however Xavier assured me the blessings of Poseidon were with us.
The Anonymous Patron even came to see us off, having wholeheartedly
approved my choice of chaperon. He arrived in a curtained sedan chair of red velvet, one gloved hand appearing to give a little wave of benediction. And so the Grand Tour began and we were bound for Greece.

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

My very dear FOM

What a waka! Have you got a star to follow? You will need one over head - to tell you have found Greece, and a sequence of others on the horizon to steer for. I feel so pleased you considered things with such care and set off in the Vernal (Spring) Equinox of March 21, that that moment in time when the centre of the Sun can be observed to be directly above the Earth's equator. if you stop at Tonga you can see the Ha'amonga a Maui a polynesian stonehenge for viewing the solstice. Perhaps you will arrive in time for the winter solstice. In Ancient Greece, winter solstice was Lenaea, “The Festival of Wild Women”. In the ancient times a man would represent the harvest god Dionysus, who was torn to pieces and eaten by a gang of women only on this day. Later in the same ritual, Dionysus was reborn as a baby. So he was a kind of found object. For a more peaceful approach In Buddhism the day is known as Bodhi Day {Rohatsu), and is celebrated around December 8th. Smell the wind, O FOM.

Kisses. Yours, MP

Anonymous said...

Have you found your bear-leader? What is a bear-leader?

Anonymous said...

I hope you took some money and plenty of honey. Would a very small bear do? Pooh, for example? Maybe it was a typo - 'cheer leader?" A kind of butler for the soul.
You must now have arrived at the heads. Latitude: -33.86496 / Longitude: 151.211945?

Anonymous said...

Speed bonny boat
Like a bird on the wing
Over the sea to Greece

Anonymous said...

Ginger is good for sea-sickness.

Anonymous said...

Now I feel anxious. I need my asthma-puffer. Hieronymous is your bear-leader. Now I get it. But what is his function? Does he serve any purpose other than a decorative pack-filler. Does he have a mission? What is his purpose-filled life? What if he fall overboard and multiplies. Have you co nsidered the environmental catostrophe; Darwinian islands peopled with giant axolotyls, all worshipping the ancient ancestor - Hieronymous.

Anonymous said...

Yo ho ho ! Follow that star! FOM, what's the weather like? Can you give me a log excerpt?

Anonymous said...

To be without qualities is good. Fie upon qualities. While other trees have their jolly good existence, it is the sandalwood trees that are cut.
- Bhamineevilas, 1.86

Anonymous said...

Dear Captain Found Objects,

Greetings carbon-based biped. Where are you. We are beings from what you call the Dog-Star. But we is not a dog. We feel deep affinity with you, carbon based biped. Maybe you have more peds than two. This is not made clear in your digital communications. We have only one ped. We am more fish-like and fond of water. Please provide latitude so nestlings can fix longitude from Venus and Pole-star to make earnest diplomacy visitation to your water vehicle. I wish to visit you in my magnetic cavitation star-ship. As you have no fleshy parts the electromagnetic effects will not affect you. However nestlings expect some genetic damage to your companion creature. This may include gigantism. My planet wishes to make contact with you, Captain F Objects.

Anonymous said...

Dear Captain FOM

Are you becalmed in whirlpool of plastic bags and baseball mitts? Please use tom toms to signal location.

judi bola said...

Speed bonny boat
Like a bird on the wing